When they get to the bar, the brewmaster from Budweiser calls over the bartender and says, "I'll have a Bud." The brewmaster from Miller follows suit: "I'll have an MGD." The brewmaster from Guinness looks at them both, then looks at the bartender and calmly says, "Coke, please." Shocked, the other two brewmasters look at the man from Guinness and ask, "Why didn't you order a Guinness?"
He looks back and replies, "Well, if you guys aren't drinking, neither am I."
edit: Hahaha, off "How to tell if you are a Russian from Northeast Philly:" Your idea of a normal Friday or Saturday night is spending it raving with 200-300 of your closest friends.