// Now an 8-year-old quote, but classic nevertheless...
Mr. McFaden: *walking through a chattering class, very quietly* Sex.
Class: *keeps talking, does not notice*
Mr. McFaden: *still very quietly* Extra credit.
Class: *perks up* Did you say extra credit? What?
Mr. McFaden: From a biological standpoint, that's just WRONG.
// Jaskot throws a hat to someone, and it doesn't quite make it to the person.
Romais: Dang. Too short; not hard enough.
Jaskot: That's what your mom told me last nigh... Shit.
Mrs. Bello: Conversation is an essential skill. Does anyone disagree?
Student: *timidly raises hand*
Mrs. Bello: Do you want to elaborate?
// During TA discussion on compassion
Mr. Torrence: So, does anybody know what the Golden Rule is?
Jess: Isn't that like 1.618...?
// Mr. Kummer's sample student budget (originally in pie chart form):
gas - 35%
fast food - 30%
girlfriend - 15%
strip clubs - 20%
Mr. Kummer: Wow, that looks a lot like my own budget. Don't tell my wife... or my girlfriend.
// History, simulating Napoleon's trial on whether he was good or bad; Russia is the witness
Prosecution: Okay, Russia. *holds up a map* This is a map of your territory. Now when Napoleon invaded, where did he touch you?