Madcap (zimdanen) wrote,

The newlyweds had never slept together and were most eager to consumate their union. The bridge in her eagerness insisted on undressing the groom, but stopped dead upon removing his shoes and socks, finding his toes grossly misshapen.
"Not to worry," the groom explained. "A case of toelio when I was a child."
The bride proceeded apace, only to stop again with an expression of shock on her face once she had taken off his pants.
"Nothing but a childhood case of kneesles," he reassured her.
Down to the basics, she reached for his jockey shorts. "I know, I know," she interrupted before her husband could say a word, "nothing but a case of smallcox."

edit: A black couple took their young son for his first visit to the circus, and by chance their seats were next to the elephant pen. When his father got up to buy some popcorn, the boy piped up, "Mom, what's that long thing on the elephant?"
"That's the elephant's trunk, dear," she replied.
"No, not that."
"Oh, that's the elephant's tail."
"No, Mom. Down underneath!"
His mother blushed and said, "Oh, that's nothing." Pretty soon her father returned, and the mother went off to get a soda. As soon as she had left, the boy repeated his question.
"That's the elephant's trunk, son."
"Dad, I know what an elephant's trunk is. The thing at the other end."
"Oh, that's the elephant's tail."
"No. Down there."
The father took a good look and explained, "That's the elephant's penis."
"Dad, how come when I asked Mom, she said it was nothing?"
The man took a deep breath and replied, "Son, I've spoiled that woman."

Also, I miss Cary. :(
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